Have you ever felt totally BURNED OUT while trying to care for your little ones? It’s always rush, rush, rush–especially when it comes to the school year. If you’re like me, you got the little ones that still need help brushing their teeth and hair, washing their face, and getting dressed. You have to go through their parent folder to make sure their homework is done, books have been read, school snack is packed (and for the year 2020, their mask is on their face and their water bottle is clean and filled).

With the older kiddos, you have plenty of extracurricular activities that include sports practices, games, meets, competitions, and band. And, I still have to make them brush their hair! A typical school day for me usually looks like this:

• 5:15 a.m. wake up, use the bathroom, start the coffee
• 5:30 a.m. wake up my daughter and youngest son
• 5:35 a.m. send daughter upstairs to wake up teenage boys
• 5:45 a.m. make sure everyone is dressed, brushed, washed, fed, and ready to go (including myself!)
• 6:15 a.m. make sure their dad is awake so I can take my oldest to band practice (which starts at 6:45)
• 6:20 a.m. drive twenty minutes to the high school to drop off my oldest son
• 6:40 a.m. pull around behind the school, drop off my son, drive home
• 7:00 a.m. swing back by the house to pick up the other kids to drive them to the bus stop half a mile away
• 7:05 a.m. bus arrives, tell kiddos bye, love ya, have a great day! then head home
• 7:10 a.m. arrive home, prepare some breakfast, tea, and my supplements for myself (plus any other self-care at this time)
• 7:30 a.m. hopefully head to the office to get to work, then spend the day staring at a computer and doing whatever else needs doing
• 12:00 p.m. make some lunch for myself and have some more tea
• 12:30 p.m. back to the office to get back to work (good thing I work from home, short commute!)
• 4:00 p.m. drive to the bus stop to pick up 2 or 3 of the kids (the rest are still at school)
• 4:05 p.m. drive the kids home from the bus, drop them off, stop at the mailbox
• 4:30 p.m. drive to the high school to pick up the older kids from practice (one is in cross country, one in football, one on the academic team; later they’ll all be in band practices, then wrestling season starts, then track and field will start)
• 6:30 p.m. drive home to have dinner
• 7:00 p.m. have kids clean the kitchen and straighten up after dinner, do homework
• 8:00 p.m. have kids take showers and get stuff ready for school the next day
• 8:30 p.m. have a cup of tea (for me!)
• 9:00 p.m. bedtime

Now, that’s just the typical school day. Notice how everything in the morning and afternoon are not only rushed and within minutes of each other, but I don’t really have time for myself. If you’re in the same boat, chances are you’re either experiencing burnout or you already have at some point.

I have compiled a list of things to do for YOU that will help avoid burnout. Want to know why this post is titled, “It’s all about YOU!”? It’s because it is! It really IS. If you’re burned out, tired, depressed, anxious, angry, annoyed: Your kids suffer. If you’re happy, fulfilled, content, pleased, excited, upbeat, comfortable: Your kids THRIVE. Because YOU are thriving. What we do for ourselves and TO ourselves affects our kiddos, more than you know.

Notice your kids bring you flowers, or a cup of water, or draw you a pretty picture. It’s not always for self-recognition or attention, it’s also because our children genuinely want to see us HAPPY. They are influenced by you.

I’m definitely not talking about hey, go on a bender because your kids will love it. Not even close! In general though, if you want to sit back with a cup of coffee and a face-mask (you can always put one on your kid for fun btw), while reading a book or catching up on the news, there’s no reason not to.

Notice in my schedule I included that time at 7:10 a.m. to include any other self-care? This is my ME time. I was a stay-at-home-mom for 14 years before going over-the-road as a truck-driver. I’ve definitely experienced burnout and boredom in my time on earth. I’m still growing and adapting, however, I have found a few small guilty pleasures in life that are budget-friendly and actually relaxing.

1. Create a list of guilty pleasures: Your list might include: soak in a bath (you can use some bath bombs or bubble bath!), go out for coffee (by yourself or with friends), get a manicure (or do it yourself), take a nice, long, uninterrupted shower, get your hair done (or do it yourself), put on some make-up or a nice outfit, use a new face cream, use a face mask and toner for your pores, read a book, buy a new book, watch your favorite movie or t.v. show uninterrupted, go to the store by yourself, get a massage, go to the chiropractor, have a cup of tea, have a bowl of ice cream, meditate, take a nap. Include anything that makes you feel comfortable and refreshed!
2. Create your own routine: If you like lists, you’ll like this one. Create a list of routines that will work for you. Even if you prefer not to have something too rigid, you are in control and your list will give you that satisfying sense of THAT control. Put at least ONE thing on the list every day that is enjoyable for you. Choose from your list of guilty pleasures. Right now, my current guilty indulgence is facial masks, cleansers, and toners, as well as make-up and hair. Odd, I know, but after I finish washing my face with an amazingly scented facewash, the scent is comforting and it leaves me feeling clean and fresh, AND it perks me up! I color and cut my own hair, watch hair and make-up tutorials, and then I do as I please with my own hair and make-up which helps me feel pretty, accomplished, and like I MATTER. You have to make yourself feel like an INDIVIDUAL or you’ll just disappear out from under yourself with titles (mom, wife, girlfriend etc.).
3. Explore tea options: Recently I have been buying different kinds of teas. I was diagnosed with Lipedema which causes my body to swell, which is exacerbated by varicose veins and old injuries. If you do a search for lymph-cleansing teas you can compile a list of herbs and supplements to help your body release toxins and excess fluids. One of my favorite tea brands is Pukka, but there are tons of others as well. I also drink a lot of fresh-brewed organic green tea. I don’t add sugar to my tea so it cuts down on excess calories. Since I’ve been drinking it, I’m not as sluggish or tired and I’ve lost a few pounds in water weight. I don’t need as much sleep and I feel healthier during the day as well!
4. Check out those supplements: As we age, and have children, our bodies just aren’t what they used to be. As a mother, studies show it takes our body seven years or longer to recover from childbirth (Postnatal Depletion). Many supplements just make expensive urine, that part is true, however, if you find out which supplements increase ABSORPTION, you won’t just be throwing your money into the toilet. I’m only 37 and was shocked at just how depleted of nutrients a 37-year-old woman is, and that doesn’t even account for giving birth to six children. I’ll compile a list of my current supplements to follow-up on this post at a later date, so check back here for that! Just remember, it takes an average of two to six weeks to see an improvement and up to 5 MONTHS to peak from your supplement.
5. Invest in a healthy protein shake or two: There are two basic types of protein shakes that I highly recommend: Plant-Based Protein and Whey Protein. If you are a vegan you can research Plant-Based Protein shakes to determine what is best for you. One of the best on the market is Shakeology, there are both vegan and non-vegan options.
6. Consider superfood or green shakes: You can always, ALWAYS make your own OR you can research some of the better nutritional shakes on the market. It’s a no-brainer that liquid food is absorbed better and easier by your body and uses less energy to break down. You’ll feel healthier and have more energy just by consuming liquid NUTRITION.
7. Use a wax-warmer or essential oils diffuser: OH MY GOSH! You will not be sorry! I started using these about six months ago and had NO IDEA what I had been missing out on! My favorite scents are vanilla, pumpkin-spice, and strawberry, which are great at making me feel relaxed at the end of the day. I use plenty of others though! Citrus scents like lemongrass, lemon, or orange are great options to make you feel energetic and wake you up. There are about a billion scents out there, I use Amazon a lot! I also found out eucalyptus, peppermint, and lavender are amazing when you or your kiddos are feeling sick. I think out of my list of things to do for YOU, this one is my favorite!
8. Sign up for a class or indulge in your favorite hobby: Our family happens to enjoy PokemonGo. So, I like to go out Poke-hunting by myself or with the kiddos. We also signed up for Tae Kwon Do as a family, which was a wonderful experience. For one thing, I worry less about my kids being bullied and unable to defend themselves. It also helps you stay flexible and achieve a good amount of exercise. You could sign up for yoga or guitar lessons. Whatever it is, make sure it’s enjoyable for you. You can always just read a book if you prefer!
9. Go out with your friends or spouse: It can be a quick coffee shop visit, breakfast, lunch, or an evening out with dinner reservations. The point is, get out there as an individual so you can briefly shed the mom or dad title and feel like a human being again!
10. Don’t forget to exercise! Take a relaxing walk in the park, join a fitness club, exercise class, or group, but whatever it is, be sure you enjoy it! Studies show that if you are doing an exercise you enjoy, not only will you stick with it but you’ll ACTUALLY look forward to it and it will release endorphins, stress, and toxins. Consider exercise to be FUN, not a punishment!

Saturdays and Sundays, I sleep in. That’s another of my guilty pleasures. In any case, the point of this post is, don’t forget about yourself. It’s easy to forget to take care of yourself when you have others to take care of, but you will have so much more to give when you feel fulfilled yourself.

What are your guilty pleasures?

Jeannie Culbertson ~The Noteworthy Mom